Dear Fat Lady On The Freeway

Dear Fat Lady,

I don't know if you know me but I'm the guy who cut you off this morning. Yes, I'll admit it, but really, you kinda had it coming. Let me say that I'm not referring to gravity, which causes numerous asteroids to crash into you, but rather that you were quite the lane hog and deserved a brisk "cut off".

You see, on the sides of each vehicle are yellow lights, these lights are called turn indicators. Each blink of the lights says to you I would like to merge into your lane much like how you snort while at the troff to indicate that you too would like to feed.

When I first pulled up in front of you there was enough space for me to merge into the lane, but you sped up in an attempt to lock me out and keep me from exiting the freeway. This is similar to how you have difficulty making it out of the front door in the morning. Luckily I know my truck well enough to squeeze it into very tight spots which I'm sure the food trapped in your jowls must feel.

So yes I did cut you off, but really you were the one who forced me to cut you off. After all, in that moment you had a choice. You could have been the nice person who let someone merge into their lane or the fat cow who was cut off.



Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com


Ps. While you were simultaneously chewing your cud and swearing at me I was laughing at a great idea for a blog entry....