I Give The Fuck Up

I'm tired of this shit.

I've had it.

I don't want to play any more.

What could I be talking about? Why another terrible date, of course. The last terrible date.

That's right, I was stupid enough to try again.

Now I've run the gambit when it comes to writing up ads. This is the last one (of well over 20) I've written for Craig's List:

If this list describes you then please respond, it means we've been looking for each other.
Do you work so much that you don't have time to date?
Do you ever find your self with a random free night and realize you have nothing to do?
Does your career come first and your personal life come second?
Would you like it to be a closer second?
Do you describe your self as a "T-shirt and jeans" kind of girl?
Do you enjoy physical activities like hiking and snowboarding?
Are you tired of guys flashing cash, but with nothing of substance to offer?
Do you enjoy silliness?
Are you cruising towards your dirty thirties (or in them)?
Do you feel comfortable with your self and your body?
How do you feel about burgers, movies, and a couple drinks?
Do you think effort out weighs grandeur?
Are you often considered brainy or geekish?
Is geekish a word?

If you've said yes to the majority of these then I think we could have a lot of fun. Let's do the ol' photo swap and have some merriment.




Ok, not the best of ads, but it does hold more promise than the other ones (trust me.)
I figure that anyone who answers it will fit into the type that I'd like to go out with. Career minded, and hopefully not psycho. (my bad)

Of the few that respond I narrow it down to three, of the three only one seems worth meeting. I say "would you like to go out for dinner and some drinks after work? Around 7 o'clock?"

So we go walking around the block, all chatty chatty. I make her laugh, I talk, I listen (a guy listen? Get out!) and we conversate. She actually compliments me on how well I hold a conversation compared to other guys she's gone out with. We stop for a beer, I introduce her to Heffenweiser she tells me all about her career. All is good in the world.

I ask if she'd like something to eat and she informs me that the people she lives with are going to make her dinner so she doesn't want to eat with me. (Diddn't you agree to dinner?) Conversation continues and I ask her about her plans for the weekend followed with "well I'd like to see you again."

She replies with "you know what, this isn't going anywhere, I'm only getting a friend vibe from you."

I thank her for her honesty (like a retard.)

I pay the bill and walk her out.

On the way to where I think her car is I ask why she decided it wouldn't work.

She says there's no spark (she must be pretty quick to get that only after an hour). She then comments that being single sucks, but she might set me up with on of her friends (be still my heart).

As we are about to enter the parking lot she asks if I'm parked over "here" to which I reply that I'm walking her to her car. She informs me that she's not parked on this side and that she was following me. She was walking ahead of me the whole time (in hindsight, it was evading).

Finally as I walk her to her car, (about 20 feet away) she tells me that I don't need to walk her to her car. I retort that I'm a gentleman but walk away as soon as she's at the car.



So What The Fuck! This is re-god-damn-diculous. From what I can tell I didn't do anything wrong, I said nothing offensive, I did nothing that would show that I'm a terrible person. Basically I put in the effort to set up this date, I convince her to go out, I put my self out on the line, and then she gives me the thumbs up or down like some roman fucking emperor? Why do I have to expend my self to pursue someone? Did you know that no one has ever pursue me?

While on this trivial date she also told me that guys often see her then talk about how cute she is when she's out of ear shot. Is this where this comes from? Because people want you, you just brush off people based on what you learn from them in under an hour? I'm not even getting a chance. I'm tired of this, tired of being on the receiving end of rejection. it doesn't matter what I do, I pursue her, I have to take her out, I have to pay, then she decides if I was worth it.


Well no more.

I'm done.

I have had less than 3 successful dates in my entire life. I have war stories that would sicken many and terrify others. (EG: I went out on a date with a girl who called another guy on our date to go out with her... That's right, she brought a date on our date.)

This is the new rule on dating from now on: I will not pursue.

If a girl shows genuine interest in me, and fIirts, I will then consider the possiblility of a date, but I will not exert any undue force to make it happen. I will not introduce my self first, I will not ask her out only to find out she has a bf (I hate that, BTW.) I would rather stay at home and play video games then whore out my selfesteem one more time on someone who doesn't really give a shit. I will not get my hopes up for promises or signs. I won't hope for offers unless there is a delivery.

I guess this means I should sign up with Game Fly, because women do not ask out guys, so I better keep my self occupied. (Before you argue this think about the last time you asked a guy out.)


FYI: This train of thought hit the tracks on my trip to Laughlin. I was in the car with my dad and this conversation occurred:

Dad- You know what I just realized Exile, you're the only one here with out a woman. Everyone's paired up but you.
Exile- I tried.
Dad- I'm sure we can find ya something. Your old Dad-do will show find you one.
Exile-um, thanks Pop.


Yeah, a four day trip to Laughlin. Boat, Sea-doos, Water skiing, alcohol, and no one to go with me. (and before you think I'm just bitching about one trip realize this has been every trip).

In summation: I hate dating, I hate being alone around 4 other couples (especially on vacation, and I get less than nothing (negative something.)



Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com