Neurotically Yours

Seeing as though I have a new girlfriend I felt I must confess something.

I am a neurotic person…

No, I actually meant to type neurotic this time (though erotic would fit nicely).

See, here’s the deal, I’m not a complete basket case like Monk, but I do have numerous little neuroses that have always just been there.

Here are A few examples:

Door locking~ I can’t be comfortable in a room unless the doors are locked, especially if I’m sleeping there
Organizing~ I have to sort things and make sure everything matches
Obsessive problem solving~ I can’t leave a puzzle unsolved; this is why you don’t leave me with a Rubik’s Cube.
Nit picking~ I keep tinkering with things, I can’t leave things broken or with imperfections without working on them.


The list goes on, but I’m in an “I can’t be that crazy” mood, so I’ll stop there. But I digress…

These neuroses are mine, I usually don’t’ let anyone in close enough to have to deal with them, and the few that I have are usually bothered by them or just ignore them. But when I love someone that person winds up within their sphere of influence.
For me, loving someone makes them an extension of myself, and thusly they become entwined with my neuroses. Peaches (my new girlfriend) is finding this one out first hand.

When I’m sleeping with the person I love I have to lock the doors around them, be it at her home or my own. Even if it’s leaving the car to go into a convenience store I have to make sure the doors are locked on the car.

The organization thing comes into play too; if you’re wondering how, realize that on Sunday night we spend part of the evening rolling her change (almost $200 worth).

My obsessive problem solving means that I’m always interested in the woman I love, and that I’m always attempting to solve the mystery that she is. I ask questions, and retain every bit of information I can to better compile a full profile on her. It’s my way of making a piece of her that I can carry around with me (far better than making hair dolls, hehehe)

The biggest problem is the Nit Picking. Essentially thing means that after every shower I run my fingers across every part of her body inspecting her. Any blemishes, stray hairs, or anything at all that requires attention will be worked on. (Pimples, clogged pores, random hairs…) Ironically this is probably the most direct outlet that my neuroses use to express their love and yet this makes women the most uncomfortable.

All in all I can understand that this makes a lot of women uncomfortable, I just don’t really understand why. Luckily I’ve found someone who understands this, a girl who gets that this is the way I am, where in the past this behavior was tolerated or ignored, Peaches seems to embrace it and appreciate it.

It feels good to know that my neuroses are accepted, but it feels better that I feel this way with her.


Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com