Exile's A Father?

No

Hell no

no fucking way no.

that is, unless, it get's you free bowling. hehehe

Sunday was Father's Day, and at the local bowling alley they will often give
free games for certain days. so it was Free bowling for all the Dad's on
Father's day. Naturally we too full advantage of this.

At the start there were nine of us bowling, 5 guys, three women, and one
little kid. But when my dad went up to book the lanes he told them that all
the guys (My dad, my brother, my cousin's husband, their friend, and I) were
all fathers.

naturally, one look at me and they got suspicious, after all, I don't look
like I could be anyone's dad, but no one questioned it.

of course I was happy to go along with the lie. I mean we spent a whole day
bowling and only paid for beer. besides, Exxon didn't report every drop of
oil spilled, so ya never know. (I'm laughing and shuttering at the thought)

perhaps it was the "wake up and start drinking" breakfast I had, or it was
the lack of sleep (thanks to the PS3), but something happened that day that
was so funny I can barely put it in words:

my Cousin went bowling with us that day. She is half Italian and half Puerto
Rican; translation? she is extremely loud and has a huge butt. (her ass is
so big it has three smaller asses orbiting around it.) so we're bowling and
she's doing bad (she argues more than she focus's on bowling) but she
actually knocks down all but one pin on her first throw. she's absolutely
ecstatic, she grabs her ball, throws again and bang hit's the one pin
getting her first spare ever.

well she's so excited that she starts jumping around, and yelling. this
commences until she finally squats down to do one final jump...

Do you remember the Incredible Hulk? when ever he'd turn green she's grab
his shirt and rip it in half, bursting through the seams? yeah, well, this
was the incredible bulk.

yup, in mid celebration my Cousin squatted down and split her pants
completely in half. her but tore through that those jeans like Michael
Jackson though a daycare.

the horror... the horror...

when this happened my brother was at ground zero (she did the squat right in
front of him) and I was a little further back. omfg I laughed so damn hard I
fell into a seat and had tears rolling down my cheeks.

for the rest of the day anytime someone bowled a split a pun about my cousin
quickly followed.

all and all it was a good day. I had a pretty good game or two, check out
the stats.

Bowler Name: Exile
Game 1: 127
Game 2: 118 (this was the game she split her pants)
Game 3: 135
Game 4: 133
Game 5: 113

Best game: 135
average: 126

I'm doing better than I have in past games, but I need to do a lot better.
still... it's a start.

after bowling we did are usual pool and BBQ deal, all and all a good day.

now, I must make like my cousin's pants and split

exile