Complimentary Peanuts

when it comes to relationships with women, all men will eventually find
stuck in a conflict of communication with their partner.

the specific conflict that I am addressing today is that of compliments.

it is true enough to say that all women have issues with their self
confidence. regardless of who it is, every woman has some aspect of
themselves that they just flat out don't like:

"I don't like my belly."
"I'm too tall."
"I hate my thighs."
"I wish my boobs were bigger, smaller, perkier..."
"I wish my hair was curly, straight, blonde, red, had more body..."

often times a woman will mash all these wayward thoughts together and create
a mental image of her self resembling Quasi Moto.

And while women drive themselves insane with a frenzy of
"does-this-make-my-butt-look-too-big" thoughts bouncing around in their
heads, guys remain oblivious. (possibly for our own safety.)

but the oblivious nature of guys does not protect them for long, after all,
if you're going to interact you can't remain entirely oblivious. (many
married men have tried and failed at this one.)

with women in such metal turmoil, some guys (the good ones) will attempt to
say nice things to their woman in an attempt to either make her feel
better, or just to let her know how he feel. but this is where things can go
awry.

see, often times when you give a woman a compliment the mental maelstrom of
their minds will shred said compliment and strip it of intention. ask any
guy and he'll have a story or two about "The Compliment That Went Wrong"
(coming to a theater near you.)

for those of you tilting your head and saying "I have no idea what's he's
talking about." (you liar faces). here is a typical example:

Boy and Girl are about to go out for the night...
girl- How do I look
Boy- you look nice
girl- nice?
Boy- very nice?
Girl- I just look nice?
Boy- no, I meant you look fantastic
Girl- don't' lie to me, I'm going to change
(momentary pause)
Girl- I'll bet I'd look better with {some girl you both know}'s {tits, ass,
butt, legs, belly...}
Boy- (pauses 1/2 a second too long)
Girl- That's it, I'm not going! why don't you just go with {the same girl
mentioned before}! I hope you both have NICE time! (door slams)

*this is why men have a shorter lifespan than women...

and girls, if you think this little slice of life is a work of fiction you
may want to take an impromptu poll... you've probably done it your self.

now, I know I'm no one to try and change the way women think (I'd have an
easier time perfecting perpetual motion.) but I think I might be able to
help.

I've compiled a list to help women understand Why You Should Just Take The Compliment, in
hopes of closing this communication gap, if only by an out of place hair...

Why You Should Just Take The Compliment:

• Take it at face value- if a guy gives you a compliment that can be taken the wrong way, DON'T TAKE IT THAT WAY! Some guys aren't exactly glib, so assume that his compliment is meant in only the most positive ways.
• Don't discourage- if a guy gives you a compliment don't shoot it down. when you're given a compliment and you reply with a contradiction it's going to result in far less coming your way. if a guys says "you're the prettiest girl in the world" just accept it. if you argue or dispute it, you might just wind up being right.
• refusal offends- if you flat out refuse a compliment it's down right offensive. we all know that compliments are often times opinions, but when you tell someone that their heart felt opinion is wrong... ouch
• F'n Frustrating- sometimes, getting a girl to take a compliments is like pulling teeth, and when it's an uphill battle it often gets to be too difficult to continue.
• Counter Productive- with the insecurities that women have, they often only see their flaws. but guys usually don't pay much attention to these so called flaws, especially if there is passion there. so if the only guy you want looking at you doesn't see anything wrong, why would you point them out to him.
• If you want it, get it- Compliments feel good. So if they feel good, don't you want more? the best way to get compliments is to be receptive to them. guys are very Pavlovian, reward them by accepting and they'll give you more.
• Throw the guy a bone, and you'll get one in return- being a guy in a relationship is tricky, often time guys feel like they are just don't know what their doing. guys will try and compliment because logically it seems like a way to bring a woman out of "a mood". go easy on a guy and accept what he's saying. it makes guys feel like we're doing something right.

The moral of this story is that sometimes you need to ignore your negative self image and accept the view of the person you're with. Let's face it, if you could choose how you look, would you rather be the beast you see your self as or the sexy thing he sees you as?

And girls, if you need a little extra help, here's something to help you feel more comfortable in your skin...





exile