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Exile Industries: Department of Redundancy Department

Thursday, February 17, 2005

Inappropriate Questions That I Want To Know

Ok, I have some questions for those who read this blog, they're actually for anyone, but I wanted you to feel special. Reply in the comments, come on, share with the class.

  1. Have you ever sneezed during sex? (were you pleased with the result?)
  2. Do you own up to peeing in the shower? (we all know that you do.)
  3. Have you ever farted at work and tried to blame your shoes. ("no, I was dragging my feet.")
  4. Do you sing out loud when listening to music you would never want anyone to know you sing with? (ie: any Ricky Martin song.)
  5. Have you ever called your boss Mom?
  6. When you're in the restroom by your self and someone else comes, do you lift your feet off the ground so they won't recognize you?
  7. Do you lie about being late and brag about being early?
  8. Do you ever give out other people's numbers when people ask for your office number?
  9. Have you ever had a sexual activity at your office? (by your self or with help.)
  10. Have you ever regifted something your shouldn't have regifted? ("no, I bought this vibrator for you.")
  11. Do you ever run the faucet after you use the bathroom to give other the impression you washed your hands, even though you didn't?
  12. Ever stare at the genitals of a coworker who has no idea how exposed they are? (camel toe or package buldge.)
  13. Have you ever showed up at working knowing full and well that not only didn't shower last night but you're wearing the same clothes as well?
  14. Ever been caught scratching your privates at work?
  15. Ever gone to work drunk or stoned?
  16. ever been caught "accidentally" looking at porn at work? (it appears on someone's blog or something.)



Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

posted by exile at 2/17/2005 01:58:00 PM

24 Comments:

  • 2. Yes, yes I do. In fact, the statistical number of people who pee in the shower used to be my late brother's pick-up line. He had a lot of odd pick-up lines. Most of them didn't work.
    9. Regularly. All of them alone. It's nice to have an office door that locks. Hopefully I'll be able to do it with someone else someday.
    For the rest of them I have boring expected answers. Sorry.

    By Blogger Kalleigh Hathaway, at Thursday, February 17, 2005 4:18:00 PM  

  • you can't just pick and choose which one's you'll answer, that's no fun. you gotta answer them all, boring or not.

    it's wierd how few people can admit to #2, or should i say going number one for question 2.

    as for #9 i have a cubical, i couldn't get away with it. "i swear i'm just typing!"

    kayten- go for it, answer them all, for meeeeeeee...

    By Blogger exile, at Thursday, February 17, 2005 4:58:00 PM  

  • hehehe, most of my answers are probably yes, i'm going to do a seperate post on my answers. unless you think i should just answer in the comments. what do you think?

    By Blogger exile, at Friday, February 18, 2005 9:30:00 AM  

  • ok i'll be jooles here (again) and post my answers.
    1. never sneezed, but teh girl did once and it kinda shot me out.
    2. i own up to it
    3. i've never had to blame the shoes but it's a well rehearsed line
    4. yeah i sing to the embarrasing songs. i pulled up next to a car full of gang bangers while rock'n to ricky
    5. yes, but i usually cover. "hey mom... used to say never count your chickens yadda yadda..."
    6. feet down, but i do scoot them back.
    7. all the time
    8. i'll give out what ever number i'm thinking. i usually have to make a lot of call backs
    9. nope, no office nookie. i won't even put out for my self
    10. yes...
    11. no, but sometimes i'll wash my hands to impress. hey, as a guy you dont' get messy as often.
    12. constantly
    13. yup, and i hope no one can smell the alcohol
    14. never caught
    15. gotten stoned @ work, but that was blockbuster.
    16. nearly, damn THL and posting nearly naked gay men! definately not the image i want people to think i'm looking at.

    ok kids, bring all your scantrons to the front of the class.

    By Blogger exile, at Friday, February 18, 2005 12:12:00 PM  

  • please give details re: inappropriate regifting...

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Friday, February 18, 2005 12:20:00 PM  

  • more specific with the question or the answer? will you be more specific with who you are, anon?

    By Blogger exile, at Friday, February 18, 2005 12:53:00 PM  

  • 1. Never...funny enuf
    2. of course, everyone does it
    3. No, I work with lots of boys, they take care of that
    4. Yes, only I don't care who hears me....I have no shame
    5. Nope, but I know someone who has
    6. Never, but let me ask you...do u flush if someone else comes in the lue when you are taking a crap so they don't hear you?
    7. Never, there's no point cuz everyone can see me...they're always watching me anyway, that's why they put me right smack dab in the middle.
    8. Just fake ones if I need to get away from a very "clingy" person and I'm wasted
    9. I can not confirm nor deny
    10. I doubt it, unless that includes giving gifts to people that you got as a gift...I've done that
    11. Always was my hands, because hello...
    12. Absolutely, strangers too
    13. No chance, but again I know some "people" that do
    14. um, ya, no
    15. course, all day people send me porn and i open my email and there it is....a la carte...it's just lovely when the elderly folk walk by and catch it....lovely.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Friday, February 18, 2005 1:00:00 PM  

  • mitzee, you can't just cop out on #9, no fair. and you tecnically skiped #15. you're going to have to see teacher after class.

    By Blogger exile, at Friday, February 18, 2005 2:10:00 PM  

  • as far as clackisms go, when one says they can neither confirm nor deny, that usually means "confirmed"....#9....as for #15.......I guess I've been a bad girl, does that mean I get the strap?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Monday, February 21, 2005 7:42:00 AM  

  • 1. Sneeze? Yes! He ended up clear across the room.
    2. No I don't pee in the shower! Mitzee, you DON'T... do you?!?!?!?!
    3. I could, we have a regular tooter around here named Guy to blame it on.
    4. God ya, especially in the car... and you're Ricky Martin.
    5. No, but I call him honey and sweetie when I'm drunk.
    6. No, but I peek under to see if there are any other feet I recognize.
    7. All the time.
    8. Only Milton's number.
    9. Yes, yes I have. And then I made him marry me.
    10. Oh there's NO re-gifting.
    11. I'm with Mitz on this one. Of course not!
    12. Yes I admit it. And I can provide details... girls, anyone want package info?
    13. Not yet.....
    14. Lord no!
    15. Just last Wednesday. And it's all Carmine's fault.
    16. Same as the others... only the "holy-shit-is-somebody-behind-me?!" surprise variety.

    Exile -- you don't know me... yet. I'm another of the great white northerners who'd like to lure you up for a visit. You can call me Shora. Games. No, I know.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Monday, February 21, 2005 11:45:00 AM  

  • hey SHORA (love the name btw)...I would MOST DEF like some "details" re: the package info.....don't hold back now....out with the goods!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Monday, February 21, 2005 12:31:00 PM  

  • To start with... have you SEEN the size of Clacky's feet?!?!

    By Blogger Shora, at Monday, February 21, 2005 12:54:00 PM  

  • Okay - you want my full answers? Geez ...
    1. Have you ever sneezed during sex?- Not that I remember, but it's possible.
    2. Do you own up to peeing in the shower? - already said yes, quite boldly.
    3. Have you ever farted at work and tried to blame your shoes. - no, my farts aren't loud, and i move away from the smelly ones quickly.
    4. Do you sing out loud when listening to music you would never want anyone to know you sing with? - no, because i don't care that people know i sing out loud to things like the Monkees or the Partridge Family
    5. Have you ever called your boss Mom? - nope, I only talk to him once every few months, so it's not likely
    6. When you're in the restroom by your self and someone else comes, do you lift your feet off the ground so they won't recognize you? -No, that's just kinda silly
    7. Do you lie about being late and brag about being early? - Nope, everyone knows I'm always late; I could never pull that off
    8. Do you ever give out other people's numbers when people ask for your office number? - Nope, I'll just refuse to give it if I don't want them to call
    9. Have you ever had a sexual activity at your office? (by your self or with help.) - already mentioned my many solo exploits
    10. Have you ever regifted something your shouldn't have regifted? ("no, I bought this vibrator for you.") - not unless you count lingerie given to goodwill
    11. Do you ever run the faucet after you use the bathroom to give other the impression you washed your hands, even though you didn't? - no, but sometimes I'll just swipe my fingertips under the stream if I have real reasons why I don't want to wash my hands properly
    12. Ever stare at the genitals of a coworker who has no idea how exposed they are? don't think i would notice, frankly, so no
    13. Have you ever showed up at working knowing full and well that not only didn't shower last night but you're wearing the same clothes as well? goodness, no - by the time i started working my crazy party days were over
    14. Ever been caught scratching your privates at work? - not that they've told me, LOL
    15. Ever gone to work drunk or stoned? - nope - i'd stay home if i were drunk or hungover too bad
    16. ever been caught "accidentally" looking at porn at work? - nope, private office, no one can tell

    See? BO-RING

    By Blogger Kalleigh Hathaway, at Monday, February 21, 2005 2:13:00 PM  

  • awww, thanks kayten, see, was that that so bad?

    so we're say'n that clacky is acctually a sasquatch? is he photographed in the woods?

    jooles, you're on the antishower-peeing band wagon? you might be our numbered on this one.

    By Blogger exile, at Monday, February 21, 2005 10:42:00 PM  

  • Mitzee, so how was number 9 pulled off, miss indiscrete. i think it will be more threatening to with hold the strap. confess, or no strap for you.

    By Blogger exile, at Monday, February 21, 2005 10:46:00 PM  

  • considering i work with a LOT of people who are now frequenting your blog, I must refrain from disclosing any further details....but truth be told, i'll bet they all have some disclosing of their own to do about #9.....and yes witholding the strap is def better torture than offering it.....lol......SHORA, YES I've noticed his enormous feet, and HANDS! I've also had the pleasure of being "up close and personal" at Simon's bday bash with clacker a wee bit on the wasted side.....soooooooooo, I can not confirm nor deny that I "THINK" you are RIGHT! what will it take to persuade him?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Tuesday, February 22, 2005 9:22:00 AM  

  • ok, now i really want an application. not only do you guys goof around all day but you also have some sort of "breakroom bordello." no fair, i don't even get time off at my job.

    By Blogger exile, at Tuesday, February 22, 2005 9:58:00 AM  

  • where the hell do you work??? sounds like slave labor to me guy.

    yes our workplace is "fun"...busy, lots of work, but "fun". makes for better productivity.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Tuesday, February 22, 2005 10:35:00 AM  

  • I work for the county, boring as all get out. i'm a meticulous paper monkey. to make matters worse i'm the person who gives everyone else work. too many people are too simple to figure out that it's just my job. *sigh* come rescue me! I'll be a canadian. just don't make me ice skate, i hate ice skating.

    By Blogger exile, at Tuesday, February 22, 2005 12:42:00 PM  

  • thus the ice skating blog....i'm not a huge fan either...but I LOVE TO WATCH HOCKEY...!!!

    come on now I AM CANADIAN afterall, and there's just something about watching big sweaty boys bash eachother around that's SEXY as all HELL!! mmmmmmm

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Wednesday, February 23, 2005 12:51:00 PM  

  • i ssuppose hockey is one of the best sports, only because of the fights. i think the fights should be more of a focal point though.

    By Blogger exile, at Wednesday, February 23, 2005 3:07:00 PM  

  • Believe me they are! I grew up around a LOT of boys who loved hockey, PRIMARILY for the fights! That's when they all stand up and start yelling and throwing their fists about, much more excited about the fights then the goals. Unless, of course, it's the playoffs, then it leans towards Goals....by far more about the GAME.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Thursday, February 24, 2005 7:47:00 AM  

  • our local team is the Might Ducks... so what's hockey?

    By Blogger exile, at Thursday, February 24, 2005 10:47:00 AM  

  • Where did you find it? Interesting read » »

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Saturday, February 03, 2007 12:13:00 PM  

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