California Drivers, "Don't Blame Me, It's The Ass Hole In Front Of Me."

There really is nothing more interesting than the California driver. From the view of someone who is out side the state that the world revolves around these road warriors seem insane, inconsiderate, and impolite. This is a very accurate view point.

Let me give you an example:
Imagine, if you will a two lane street, the left turn lane is the on-ramp for the freeway. I am stuck in the left lane behind a large gas truck (the trucks that deliver gas to the gas station). This huge truck is trying to cut into the left turn lane from my lane. Needless to say no one is willing to let him in. Finally there's a break and he starts making his turn. Midway though a woman slams on the gas in her SUV and charges the gas truck. She quickly slams on the breaks and slide up to the truck's tires, it was as if she was expecting this enormous truck. Somewhere in her soccer mom mind she thought that charging a gas truck was a good idea. The truck driver, with out flinching pointed the appropriate finger at her and continued onto the free way.

Another example:
I pulled up to the gas station at the local Costco, where the lines for the pumps mirror the lines in the store. I'm fueling up my truck when the guy behind me pulls up inches away from my bumper. A moment or two goes by and my truck is full, of course the guy behind me is having a coniption fit that I'm taking this long. As I pull out the nozzle I realize the van in front of me is still filling up and he won't be done any time soon. So naturally I get back in my truck and start listening to the radio. From the corner of my eye I see the guy behind me panamimeing that he wants me to move and that I'm some kind of apple (I don't' read lips too well.) I realize this guy doesn't know that I'm completely boxed in so I decide to humor him and put my truck in reverse. I lean over the back of my seat and motion to him that he needs to back up. Frustrated he backs up... Right into the car behind him. My laughter quickly subsides as I notice the van in front of me is pulling out and I leave angry man to deal with his new friend.

As for my self:
I'm the guy who cuts into lanes at the last min to keep from waiting. Usually the (pick any freeway in CA) off ramp is backed up and of course I can't possibly wait in line. So I slow down in the lane next to the off ramp lane and jump in at the last min. There have been times I'll nearly exit on the shoulder trying to avoid waiting. Also, if I need to take a lane and no one will let me over, and they rarely do, I just swerve at them from my lane (I learned this one from my mom). What you do is act like you don't see them and swerve as if you were going to take their lane and didn't see them. This often frightens them so bad they slow down and you jump in.

I'm not a bad driver, I'm just creative.


Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com