Do You Ever...

Completely rhetorical. But...

Do you ever...

1. Get so bored at work that you constantly use the restroom just as an excuse to leave your desk?
2. Get all uncomfortable when your undies are out of their groove?
3. Stare off into space, only to realize that you're actually staring at someone resulting in them getting all agitated?
4. E-MAIL IN ALL CAPS AND HAVE PEOPLE RESPOND WITH "STOP YELLING"?
5. Find your self so wrapped up in a TV show or movie that you start talking to the main character, arguing with them, and even becoming disappointed when they don't listen to you?
6. Offer someone a couple chips out of a bag and they reach in a touch every god damn chip with their unwashed hands?
7. Give someone a compliment and they take it as an insult? (you've lost weight!.... No, I didn't think you were that fat before... I mean you weren't huge... How about you're not as fat?)
8. Make a color coding (or different system) so complicated and detailed that you don't know how to work it?
9. Sit in traffic and see someone digging away at a booger and wish you could take a picture to blackmail them?
10. Go in the bathroom an hear someone letting out such a humorous string of farts you run out before you explode with laughter?
11. Have a sneeze that feels so good it can only be described as an "ol' factory orgasm"?
12. Find your mind drifting off to such dirty thoughts that when someone interrupts with a question that can't pull your self back to reality?
13. Make a list on your blog cause you can't think of anything else to write about?

Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com