Chuck Norris Facts, Bitch

Have you ever heard the Chuck Norris Facts before?



well, after a long debate and discussion at work i started working on my own list of Chuck Norris facts
(seriously, i don't know why they pay me.)

so, with out further delay...

Exile Industries: Department Of Chuck Norris Facts



When chuck Norris uses the Total Gym, the machine sweats.




while it is assumed that if you fired a bullet at Chuck Norris he could stop
it with his bare hands. unfortunately we can never know this for sure seeing
as though Chuck Norris would kill you before the gun ever went off.



bullet proof vests are made of Kevlar and strands of Chuck Norris' beard.



Q: How much wood could a wood chuck chuck?
A: As much as Chuck Norris will allow.



when Chuck Norris goes dives in to the ocean Tsunami warnings are issues.
not because of the splash, be cause the water is running from him.



with a single kick, Chuck Norris can stop a train... FROM EXISTING!




Chuck Norris can do anything you can do with his arms tied behind his back.



The only person who could write Chuck Norris's biography is Stephen
Hawkings.



With a single punch, Chuck Norris can not only break the sound barrier, he
destroys it.



of course, i had to throw some props to my friend Doug, who wasted his day thinking up facts with me. here's Doug's List:

Chuck Norris's fist have their own gravitational pull, so he doesn't
actually throw a punch, you come to his fist.



Chuck Norris keeps his beard short by fear.



the only think Chuck Norris fears is another Chuck Norris




Exile