HNSU- Half Nekk'ed Shut-Up

Ok, at the ripe old age of twenty-eight i think i might be finally learning something that i should have learned years ago.

the lesson? simple:
Some times i need to learn to shut the fuck up.

yup, i know you're all thinking "um, we could have told you that," and i'm sure you also know the line for such a "tell'n" is quite long. but the truth is i really do need to stop talking.

here just a few examples:


1. as you may recall, i have been collecting used toner cartridges to recycle for credit at the office supply store for my nefarious purposes. i've been doing it for over a year now, and i've gotten quite good at it. the shipping department calls me every time someone leaves one on the dock for recycling. even the janitor fishes them out of the trash for me.

well, yesterday i thought i'd be crafty and ask the office assistant from the other office to save them for me.

She asked why.
i told her because i recycle them.
she asked why i go through the trouble.
i told her i get little coupons.
she asked what they were for.
i said they were for three dollars off at Office Depot (staples got all gay about it.)
she said that sounds great and that she'd run it past the new company owner...

shit. as you can guess, the owner of the company had the "hey, i have an idea" and has now decreed that he wants all the toner from both companies collected so he can get the money for them. yeah, this guy just installed a 40 inch, 1080p LCD flat screen TV in his office because sometimes he gets bored, and he's going to take away my toner cartridges!

*sigh* if i had just said "i'm just saving the planet," i would have two companies worth of toner cartridges, now i have none. oh well, at least the guys on the dock and the janitor haven't heard about this... yet.


2. i started talking to a girl who wanted me to be completely honest with her. i agreed. then she mentioned that she had made a "no sex vow" to herself. now, a rational guy would have evaluated the situation, and just kept their opinion to themselves. instead, i told her how i felt about "no sex vows" and basically blew any chance i had at tricking this girl into sex. (yes, that's where i am right now.)


3. there was this girl at work that i really liked who i knew was very religious. i noticed that she started liking me a bit, and i was quite happy with the results. now, had i just shut the hell up about my religious background i'm sure i could have slithered my way into a relationship with her. now all i'm getting is a bi-weekly bible beating.


So this HNT i'm finally going to do what you've all been hoping for, I'm Shutting The Fuck Up!

(for at least five Min)


Wait a tick! maybe the problem isn't not shutting up, i just need to quit being so damn honest! hmmmm....


HHNT!


Oh, and my little minions, don't forget to keep throwing in your guesses into my HNT contest. you're always welcome to try again and again. plenty of people have thrown their guesses in, but no one has gone over 40% correct. so click and vote! you know you wanna
Exile