Peanut Butter & Sex-Jelly Sandwich

dude, wtf? why is it ever time i have to buy condoms there are 50 fuck'n kids in that isle? have you ever been in that isle? it's nothing but adult diapers, tampons, and maxi pads (young adult diapers). ugh.

and while i know i've ranted about this before, why is it buying lube is so much worse? not is the store crawling with lil' bastards but every person in the store seems to see you grab the lube off the shelf? and where does this leave me? atanding in line behind a gaggle of nine year old girls with my economy brand lube and a cold sweat.

all this because i'm conciderate... perhaps i should adopt the philosophy of "what? you didn't bring your own? well, sucks to be you. now, try to relax..."

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The Most Fun You Can Have With Farm Animals

So, as we all know I'm a trophy whore.

so when someone told me about scooping up farm animals and having a good time with them, i said "sure, I'm down".

so, i give you... Flock!



what's the point of this game? well, here's the deal, there's a bunch of little islands with farm animals on them. (sheep's, cows, pigs, and chickens). each island is a puzzle, your job is to take your little UFO and "scare" all the animals into your spaceship, the Mother Flocker.

the trick is that the animals are so scared of your beam that they'll run off cliffs, or into traps. oh, but there's more. Crop circles, wolves eating your sheep's and chickens, not to mention accidental ripping their fur off. (turns out my tractor beam is stronger than i thought)

surprisingly as weird as this game is it's a lot of fun, and challenging as all get out.

though, having this much fun with a sheep may mean i need to move out of the valley of the dirt people.

"I've been a baaaaa'aaad boy"


Exile

search never ending.

how goes the job search you ask? ugh.... it's beenn a month since i was laid off and i'm finally going on my first "real" job interview. the reason for the quotes is that this first non-staffing agency interview.

durring the "hunt for a job" i've been wondering which is more difficult, searching for a girlfriend or getting a job.

i've decided that looking for a job is far worse, the reason well, while the possibility of "settleing" in both regards will end badly, of the two, you "have" to get a job. (too bad there isn't a hand-lotion equivelent to a paycheck)

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Don't Mind Me, Just Bored...

Exile

Um, Why Would I Want To Fuck Your Crazy Ass?

Nothing special, just sitting around with my yahoo pager on and i got message from someone who answered my personal add a year ago or so.

this is what i have to deal with:


None None: hi
exile509: hello there
None None: how r u
exile509: good, haven't talked to you in forever
None None: i know
exile509: matter a fact, i think i may need to re-add you
None None: lol
(i added her back on my yahoo)
exile509: i just got a notice that you're on-line
None None: k
None None: whats new
exile509: nothing much
(i go through my archives to find a pic of this chick so i know who i'm talking to)
None None: still busy
exile509: that sucks
None None: nmo im askin r u still busy
exile509: hehehe
exile509: i've had some time free up
None None: y
exile509: work stuff
None None: dating?
exile509: sure
exile509: what about you?
None None: no
exile509: no? did you find someone?
None None: no
exile509: just not into dating?
None None: guys r like u
exile509: huh?
(my gears start turning...)
None None: if they know u wont put outthey dont wanna b bothered
exile509: oh yeah, now i remember you
(crap, i remeber this one, a born-again hypa-christian)
None None: lol
exile509: as i recall you tried to make me feel bad for being the way i am
None None: no u tried to convince me that im crazy for not putting out
exile509: no i didn't
exile509: you went on some rant on how all men want is sex and so on
None None: i still believe that
exile509: thats like saying all women want is money
None None: i want money
None None is typing a message.
None None: but i dont need a man to get it
exile509: uh huh
exile509: well listen, it's great that you decided to stop by and say hi and all, but seeing as though i'm not really in the mood to be chastised by someone who thinks i, and all men, are slime because we enjoy sex. i'll have to say fair well.

how do all the nut jobs seem to find me? and why can't they forget about me?
yeesh



Exile

HND- Half Nekk'ed Driver

Updating my blog? that's crazy talk.

Updating my Driver's Licence? even Crazier!

my first licence pic was done when i was sixteen. now, nearly thirteenly years later they finally made snap a new one. (guess they needed to update the Sexy Index for california).

So this HNT i decided to show the old and the new.

The Old:


The New:


BTW, that is not a double chin, i just didn't shave that day and it created a shadow (you belive me, right?)


On a Postitive Note: i was in and out of the DMV in less that 45 min. that was awsome.



Exile

Who You Gonna Call?

Rookie?!?!?!

a secret unknown to many, when i was a kid i always wanted to be a Ghostbuster. so when i heard this game was coming out i thought "cool, play as a Ghostbuster, I'm down." But seeing that you're going to be the fifth member of the team, working along side the rest of the guys? Fuck yeah.

of course, if i were one of the Ghostbusters, i think i'd probably have a different suggestion for a rookie...



Exile

Not The Kind Of Laid I Was Hoping For

It seems likes as soon as I'm on top i seem to get knocked back.

this post may be a little late, but for the past two weeks i've had quite a bit of "free time."

yep, Ol' Exile was laid off.

remember the post that i wrote a while back about the people in charge? yeah, well they struck again and down sized my department down to two and a half people.

i kept in good spirits while they were telling me the decision was final.
i smiled while they said that if things turned around they'd call me.
i shook hands as i was escorted out the door.

two weeks now i've been "looking" but in order to survive i've been picking up every bit of side-work can. slave labor with my dad (moving 1000 lbs trees) and making lighting rigs for someone who runs a motorcycle shop, and being a landlord.

yeah, i finally land the ideal roommate (the guy lives in San Francisco, but works out here, so he's using the room like a hotel), and start turning things around when i lose the one constant i had going for me.

as far as the job goes, i think it was inevitable. i talked to my (ex)boss and the company is up for it's bi-annual calibration and re certification. this little "chore" costs over $20,000, and according to the (ex)boss they can't afford to buy paper towels.

oh well, guess i just need to go find myself a new "monkey job"






On a side note, my Mom's cousin committed suicide today. on my mom's side of the family that's five plus suicides. so this morning when my grandma called my mom to let her know she made sure "check to see that Exile doesn't commit suicide too." Gee thanks for thinking of me, i guess.



Exile