How We Do It

Sometimes people ask, "How do you guys do it?"

To that I reply with a series of innuendos and hand puppets.

They quickly rephrase their question, "how do you deal with the distance?"

*Sigh*

The distance it a huge bitch to deal with, but at the same time, it doesn't affect how we feel about each other. We have a connection that just spans the 3000 miles like it's nothing.

We talk for hours without any concept of time. In other words, a quick call usually runs two or three hours long. (At this point the married couples are completely lost to this concept). Really, it doesn't matter what the topic is, or how we've arrived at it, but we banter like it's no body's business. (For proof, just check out my cell phone bill).

We also tend to treasure the little things far more than anything else. You’d be amazed how significant and wonderful a trip to the store can be when you're with the person that you've been starving for. I can't count how many times

"Everyday single day, everywhere I go, I have her on my mind, so to actually have her with me, there aren't words to describe it."

But the longing for one another does get difficult. There are so many nights where we lie in beds, thousands of miles away, just wishing we could roll over and kiss each other goodnight... simple little kisses...

In the end, it's better to miss the person that completes you than it is to remain completely incomplete.





five more days


Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Someone Has A Sunburn

I hate Sunscreen.

i'm not even that much of a fan of lotion.

i hate the way it leaves my skin feeling all greasy and dirty. (i can find so many better ways to feel dirty...)

when i have to use sunscreen, i only use this stuff


It keeps me from roasting and unlike other sunscreens, it doesn't feel like the inside of a gay man's ass. (sorry Polt)

But, as miserable as sunscreen is to wear, atleast it washes off, unlike the sunburn that results from it's absense.


And yet, there are those who don't take these greasy precautions...




Nor do they follow the rules of how to tan


These people often find themselves looking a bit "crustacean-y".


In six days i have to be on Hella watch to make sure the girl doesn't turn her fair skin into a forrest fire. i'm going to be busy keeping this lobster from going to pot. (I heart puns).


I just other parts don't get too lobster-y.




Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Haiku Friday

Crazy excited
not only is it my birthday
i get to see her!



i'll see her May fifth
when she's in my arms i'll squeeze
kiss her like crazy



butterflies flutter
seven nights wrapped in passion
naughty will happen







Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

HNS- Half Nekk'ed Sniper

As you all know, I'm a gamer.

Over the past few months my PS2 has been orbiting the abyss, and recently it finally crapped out. it would reluctantly play video games (occasionally locking up), and DVDs were just right out.

So finally i broke down and contacted Sony, for $50 plus shipping i could send out my old one and get a refurbished one.

I know I'm buying an old system, but it's cheaper than the PS3

i was so excited yesterday, the PS2 arrived and i was ready to rock... yeah, not so much.

i open the box,
i plug in the system,
i set the clock,
i inserted a DVD,
i watched to my chagrin as the fucker did the same thing my old one did.

mother fucker!

I called Sony and they attempt to tell me that i would have to pay to ship this one back. i made sure they knew they were wrong.

Hell hath no fury like a gamer deprived.

This HNT i had to show Sony who the boss is....






i guess i could have gone to this extreme...




Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Geek Fetish

I have a Geek Fetish.

I don't know why it is, or where it comes from, but there is something about brainy, clever, geeky chicks that is a total turn on. Now, don't get me wrong, looks are important, so is personality, sense of humor... but if you throw brains into the equation, yum!



Kari Byron (of Mythbusters fame) is a perfect example of this. She's a total knock out and pretty darn weird, but the fact that she's wicked smart is the key to her hotness.



Women with this intelligence have a quirky side to their personality that makes them absolutely irresistible. They're intelligent enough embrace the idea that their sense of humor doesn't need to be tied to notions of "normality." they dabble in silly, and goofy, all the while hinting at the fact that they are so much more than what they're letting you see.

Sweet smiles often hide their sharp minds.


I've always found that these little foxy geeks exude a beauty that goes far beyond that of the superficial.

A hot nerd with an inner beauty that matches her outer beauty...

How could i possibly resist?





Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Sometimes It Hurts

Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

HNT- Half Nominated Thursday

I was so nominated, that's right, me, nominated... In Your Face God!

the most amazing thing is that of all the blogs i read i was the only one that was nominated too... oh wait... no, half of my sidebar was nominated (keep in mind the other half is full of porn).

But regardless of how many people have been nominated, it was really cool that so many people nominated my lowly little blog. So in turn i thought i would nominate the blogs that really make me think.

And in my usual way i had to change things a bit, so every nomination will also include a little extra something. A peak into the secret lives of each other these thinking blog's authors...

(I've been writing the word nominated quite a bit).


I give you Exile's Nominations
(in no particular order)


1. The S Spot~ Written by our sweet little amine babe Shay, she provides, not just an sexual education, but a means to feel OK about panty sniffing. i have to say that the best thing about reading her blog is that she not only gives you information about all things sexual, but she writes like you were just sitting on the couch chatting with her (while thinking numerous naughty thoughts.)

Shay's secret:



2. Sassy Tirades~ Written by Sassy, her writing is like a booty call that you might just call the next morning. Her style is that of random wit, from pictures of window licking children to her tater tots for all to see.


Sassy's Secret:



3. It's still all about me...~ Written by Randi, she ranges on topics from Dodgers to movie reviews. Randi is one of those people that you just can't help becoming wrapped up in.


Randi's secret:



4. Polt's Palace~ Written by our favorite bear, Polt. Polt is the kind of guy that when things get hard he really get's behind you and doesn't pull out, not matter how sticky a situation might get. in a world full of melancholy homosexuals, Polt puts the happy back in gay and we're all grateful.

Polt's Secret:



5. Views From The Backrow~ Written by Os, this trumpet blowing blogger has given way to the mental juggernaut that is HNT (and the http://hntanon.blogspot.com/). But Os is so much more that a provider of HNT goodness, he's a gentleman and a scholar.


OS's Secret:



6. Hollz Hallway~

Ever give a whale a tic-tac? Toss a toothpick in a volcano?

She's naughty, she's saucy, and she has marker fights.
She's our Holly, it's now wonder we wuv her.

Holly's Secret:



7. The Garden Of Hella~ Once upon a time, there was a beautiful girl who lived in the land of ice and poutine. Her beauty was convented by many, but she only had eyes for one Cali boy, a boy who she bestowed four magical words... WELCOME TO CANADA BITCH. when you read hella's blog you can see that she has an incredible strength of of both character of spirit. (not to mention a really hot ass!)


Hella's Secret:




These are the blogs that make me think, and while they all have so many secrets, who am I to judge?


Happy HNT!










Here are the rules from the originating site of the award. Rules that i had my way with like a Mormon on prom night:

Should you choose to participate, please make sure you pass this list of rules to the blogs you are tagging. I thought it would be appropriate to include them with the meme.
The participation rules are simple:

1. If, and only if, you get tagged, write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think (or not, you can play if you weren't tagged and you don't have to play if you were).
2. Link to this post so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme (um... yeah, i don't have that)
3. Optional: Proudly display the 'Thinking Blogger Award' with a link to the post that you wrote That was that! Please, remember to tag blogs with real merits, i.e. relative content, and above all - blogs that really get you thinking! (or touching your self)


Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

For Hella's Grand-pappy

There once was an old man named James
who made a number of claims.
But this man from Guelph,
was hung like an elf
and in bed faced many shames.

Such was the plight of this geezer,
to always bed a woman but not please-her.
So one night he took some pills,
to give his latest some thrills,
but all the thrusting and shaking was just from a seizure





(Get better soon Gramps, cause my limericks aren't very good)

Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

A Musical Moment

I sing this song to make you smile,
i sing it because it's just my style.





Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Haiku Friday ~ Randi Edition

i heard about it
bad news for the Dodgers Fans
a new policy

Stadium Wide Ban
they will no longer serve beer
at Dodger games

Why did this happen?
Cause they lost the Opener!
(big hugs for Randi)

Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

HNWD- Half Nekk'ed Water Drinker

So, as some of you may recall i have given up caffene, and let me tell you it sucks so many balls.

I miss caffene, and worst of all, it taunts me everywhere i go.

it's everywhere, and just when i thought i finally had it beat i go to costco and they're giving out free samples! WTF? since when does Costco give you free samples of monster? i mean, come on! were the cosmos just fucking with me?

What's next? getting a free pair of shoes the day after you foot amputation?

This bitch just loves to fuck with me i tells ya


Ugh, so now i'm on a water regamit. every day i'm supposed to drink 16 glasses of water a day. needless to say my pee is so clear i'm not sure if i'm acctually going or not.

So this HNT i'm submitting my strugle to overcome caffine and my struggle to drink this much F'n water!



That's right, drink it in bitches...




BTW, if you click here on the extra large picture, you'll see my Easter Presents from Hella at the bottom of the pic, hehehe







Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Searching

I've been looking for you my whole life.

So many times i thought i found you, so many times i gave everything i had to the wrong person.

There were times i thought that if i settled or gave up a few of the things i wanted i could find someone who could be you.

The search has been long, and in the years of solitude I've watched so much of what i had to offer fade away. The few things i had left were stripped away by all those who posed as you in my search.

I have lost so much of my self in this journey to find you, and now that i finally found you i only only hope i have enough left to give you.

Regardless of how much I've lost, just know that everything I have left is all yours.




Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Haiku Friday ~ Easter Edition

It's Jesus' B-Day!
No wait, this is when he died
Mel Gibson said so

Didn't stop Jesus...
He came back as a bunny,
to hide stinky eggs.

two thousand years later
priests take many positions
to alter some boys.






Happy Fuck'n Easter!







Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

HNSC- Halk Nekk'ed Spring Cleaning

As many of you know, I am a very systematic person. I have a system for cooking, for cleaning, and even for taking a... well, you know.

And seeing as though it's spring, i thought I'd share with you how i clean a shower, after all the sexiest thing a man can do is clean.


The Shower Cleaning Routine Of Exile

1. Turn the shower on at it's highest temperature
2. leave the fan off and close the door for 10-15 min.
3. shut off water and throw Comet all over the walls
4. strip nekk'ed (yes, completely nekk'ed)
5. step into the shower and scrub like the damned
6. keep scrubbing
7. turn the shower back on while inside (you're covered in cleanser, no point in strutting around)
8. using a crappy souvenir cup wash down the walls, washing away any Comet (i finally found a use for one of those things)
9. wash your self (I'm usually a sweaty mess by this part anyways)
10. enjoy!


And as for the HNT portion, well, i threw in a visual or two from steps 5 & 6.




Oh, and if you want a picture of my cleanliness with out the pesky shower curtain blocking your view just click here



A happy HNT to you all

No showers were actually cleaned in the posting of this blog


Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Senor Mutant Ninja Turtles

With the release of the CG version of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles i just had to comment. i mean, when i was a kid hating other kids i used to watch tons of TV, and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was one of the few shows that actually held any appeal.

I, of course, was fan of Donatello.



He was the genius of the group, he created all their weapons, tools, machines, and gizmos, all of which, made out of trash. (They often went wrong, but they were still cool).


yes, i had a few toys,
and yes, i wanted to be a ninja (I mean, who wouldn't.)

While i haven't seen the new movie yet, I've heard that it takes place some time after the other movies, I've always wondered just what those wacky turtles have been up to after all these years...








Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com