What Up My Cracker's?

So check it yo, I be'n chill'n out gangsta style and, um, dawq... G unit?

ok, I'll stop now...


I must first say that I haven't forgotten about all my bitches, but seeing as though I'm coming up on the transition from phone monkey to lab monkey I don't have time to blog at work. (I mean, what are they paying me for?)

needless to say I haven't forgotten about all you bloggy bloggers, to prove it I'm stringing together a little something some thing for this weeks HNT.


My self and a few other HNT'ers are putting together a very special HNT this week. In celebration of the scares and scars that Halloween brings, we're all going to dawn the clothes from the time that brought us the most scares and scars...

HIGH SCHOOL



So seeing as though I'm so tied up lately I'm hoping everyone will join for a little blog camaraderie. Show some love for the Exile trapped behind his desk and dawn those clothes that trapped you during all those "formative" years. So break out those old "throw backs," the uniforms, jerseys, or just the clothes that you wore every day (and probably didn't wash).

My P.E. shorts are ready, are yours?




Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Haiku Friday

Showed Misti the love
Exile, Hella, and Moe
H N T style

the fish tank is up
bubbles and running water
man i have to pee

no plans for the "ween"
might go as Mormon Satan
recycled costume





Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Like Every Freeway Off-Ramp In LA, I've Been Tagged (Updated)

So sweet and innocent little Hella decided to viciously Tag my ass!

More Questions You Didn't Want To Ask! (or know the answers to)

My Earliest Memory - no one belives me, but i distinctly recall being fed from a bottle and concluding that if i opened the side of my mouth to allow air in i could drink easily
(yes, thinking about my self as a baby just gave me a shiver)

At School I - was misserable, picked on at school, picked on at home, and my stomach issues decided to mature before i did.

My First Relationship - (not counting Jr High nonsense) was with my first girlfriend Patty. She lied to me about her age through the first part of our relationship so by the time i realized that she was 4 years younger than me i was already in trouble. (19 and 15...)

My Mom & Dad Always Told Me - that i should try and be more like my brother

I Wish I Had - Super human abilities, like Telekenisis or Telepathy

Most Humiliating Moment - There's been so many, so i'll go with the last one:

While visiting Hella, Sass, and Mr. Sass we went to Dave and Busters. upon returning from a trip to the bathroom i rejoined the group. mid hand caress something didn't seem right, before i could think of a way out of it, i hear Sassy chime in "um, wrong girl."

yeah, i snuggled up to Sass instead of Hella...


Most Happy Moment - exactly 13 days ago

At Home I Cook - Burgers! (when i cook, usually it's ham, cheese, and balogna sanwhiches.)

My Favorite Gadget Is - My Laptop. it brings me word from the out side world, information, a direct connection with friends, and porn porn porn...

I'm Very Bad At - Directions, or shoudl i clarify that i get lost easily, and often. chances are if i've never been there i'll have a story about how i got lost getting there.

When I Was A Kid, I Wanted To Be - A venanarian or an inventor

It's Not Fashionable, But I Love - My highschool PE shorts. they're super thin, and have no elastic left to get in the way of some good scratch'n

Friends (would) Say I Am - a Pervert (they know me well)

The Song I'd Like Played At My Funeral Is - Either


or




If I Could Only - Let go of the past

Hardest Thing I have Ever Done Was - Let her go

What I Don't Find Amusing Is - Causing physical and/or emotional pain in others. (yet i still think the Three Stooges are funny)

If I wasn't Me, I'd Like To Be - A hero.

At The Moment I am Watching - My life tick by

If I Were A Car I Would Be - What else...


I Often Wonder - if something like me can ever find love and happiness
(but i know better than to wonder about these things anymore)

And now for something completely different:




Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

HNT For MiSTi

So as we all know, Misti is my little bitch.

And usually she's a very good little bitch, she's even earned herself a ball (or two.)



But recently, she snapped at me. *gasp* Now, usually when someone snaps at me they do it for a good reason (that reason being that I'm acting like an ass).

Now, normally a snappy bitch would earn a swat on the nose. But after consulting Moe Lester, I realized that the reason for her "snap-osity" was that she hasn't been feeling the love. (Moe is all about the positive reinforcement).

To rectify this situation I felt that a treat was in order, a super duper ultimate cream dream treat.

So I've decided to dedicate this HNT all to my little bitch Misti, and best of all, this HNT is in tandem!


Here's some love'n Exile and Moe style



And of course, Queen Hella had to show some love'n too!


HHNT little bitch,
HHNT to all my little bitches.




Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Clean’n Out Some Cobwebs

Seeing as though I'm going to start my new postion soon (which means far less daytime blogging) I thought I'd expunge some of the arbitrary through that have been brimming over in my mind. Enjoy the barrage of bullets.

· I used the word arbitrary in the last sentence because I’ve noticed that there are hundreds of blogs out there that use the word “random” in the title, hell, I’ve used it tons of time on my own blog. (Thank you MS Word Thesaurus for saving me from my own redundancy)

· A while back I mentioned that my parents were looking to “borrow” $5000 from me, I found out this weekend that they only asked me for money, not my brother. Boy I like being the responsible one.

· On Saturday I went cruising around town with my brother to help him scout for new jobs and found out there are two television stations right down the street from me. Now, where’s that resume?

· The doctor called me back (well, the nurse called) about my blood work and asked me point blank “do you drink a lot of monster?” yeah, turns my liver is at 3 times the level it’s supposed to be at due to drinking a can every morning. I asked if this was anything serious and she said she wouldn’t tell me until I came in for a physical… yeah, I’m not nervous.

· I finally put my fish tank together. It’s an amalgamation of bits and pieces of stuff I either got on sale or for free. All it needs now is glass for a lid, some rocks, and the fish will shortly follow! Yes pics will be posted… No, I won’t be naked in them… Yes, I know you’ve lost interest…

· I have come to grips with the fact that my Kumquat tree is dead. It picked up a strain of “scale” (from a jasmine plant I bought on sale). These things popped up all over it and drained it dry for months. All the poisons I bought to kill them off did nothing, because no one could identify what the hell these things were. (They were purple lumps with white spots). Turns out that it was such an unusual strain that it only grows on vine plants, so the long and the short of it is that my Kumquat tree had aids.

· I desperately need to donate blood, not because there is a shortage (which there is), but because my nosebleeds are getting worse. (I was 15 min late to work today)

· Every day at 5:00 on the dot the girl that works upstairs goes home, I usually take my time because I’m usually late showing up. A few weeks back she decided to share here insight with me that “the reason you don’t rush to get out of here every day is because you don’t have anyone to go home to.”

· I was reading this weeks Post Secret and came across this one:
Made me wonder how many little mistakes I’ve made still haunt other people.

· This morning I thought to my self “maybe I should get back into taking my vitamins so I can be healthy.” I just noticed that the expired in March.

· My truck is so filthy that now has a natural theft deterrent (not like the AM/FM cassette player isn’t tempting enough).

· I’m in the mother of all ruts. I was thinking about the whole “what do I want to do when I grow up” thing, and I figure I should get into video editing. (I remember being quite a natural at it in high school.) The more I thought about it the more I realized that my main reason for why I’m not doing it yet is because I keep letting myself get tied down to things. For example, right now I’m holding off on doing things with my life because I own my condo and have to make payments on it. Part of me thinks that the best idea would be to just rent out my room and leave my roommate Amber in charge of my place while I move far away from my life here and focus solely on advancing my career… of course, part of me also wants to be a crime fighter…

· People at work love giving me really ambiguous projects cause they figure I have nothing else to do with my time but go off of the limited information they’ve given me to get their project done. The pisser is that they’re right.

· There’s a Muslim church (Mosque?) down the street from my office. We have no interaction with them save for the fact that once a week they all gather there and park their cars in our parking lot. As much as it pisses us off no one ever complains because we don’t want to appear racist.

· My family decided that this year instead of buy presents for everyone, we would draw names and one person would spend $200 on only the name they drew. I don’t think they realize that I don’t spend over $200 on the entire family…

· Women have a career option than men never get, they can opt to be a “stay at home Mom.” I mean sure, there are guys that try and do this, but they’re no longer regarded as men.

· Last week I had to wear a pair of old dress pants to work (the regular ones were in the laundry). Well as it turns out these pants (which I’ve had issues with in the past) must have shrunk sitting at the bottom of the drawer because when I put them on they were a bit snug on my “snuglies.” Now, for the most part, it’s not like anyone is looking at my junk on an average day (*sigh*). So why is it while walking down the hallway I pass by the foreign-guy-of-questionable-sexual-orientation stop right in front of me and attempt to converse with my wang. Now, don’t get me wrong, I know my want is magnificent, but there’s a fine line between a glance and a full-blown ocular fixation. (Yes, I look at my fair share of boobies, but I have the common courtesy to move my eyes up that necessary 16 inches to make eye contact.)

· It’s October and it’s 86 degrees out side, WTF? Was Lake Elsinore supposed to be part of Australia?

· Last night, before leaving work, I thought "you know, I should help out the rest of the office and whipe down the confrence room table before the big meeting tomorrow." yeah, turns out Lysol Wipes can acctually remove the furnature polish from an all wood table... ooops...





Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

This Is My Son, Satan Jr.

I was watching the Omen last night and it got me thinking. If I found out that my kid was the “Anti-Christ” I’d be pretty proud. I mean, usually, kids are the foul snot-nosed beasts that spread filth everywhere, but Damien seemed rather chill, a little creepy but aren't they all?

The best part about raising the Anti-Christ is that he would have unlimited potential. I mean, most parents’ hope kids will amount to something special, like a doctor or president, but find themselves disappointed after they realize college was three bong rips away from an over priced day-care. But little Damien is fulfilling a prophecy, absolves you of tons of effort as a parent.

But just imagine if you knew that your kid was going to be the Anti-Christ. You know he’s going to make serious money, hell, if he rules the world, who needs money? “Hey son, Dad-o could use a new fish’n boat. When you’re done eroding the souls of humanity, would you mind work’n on that for me? Thanks champ.”

And it’s not like you’d be in for that much opposition either. From what I could gather from the movie, when the greatest threat to humanity walks the earth the “good guys” only send one nutty priest to warn the parents. Think about it, the devil even gives the “good guys” 7 or 8 different signs, and yet no one was ready. The Catholic Church must run by the same people who were in charge of the Katrina disaster.

I can just imagine an encounter with another parent in line at the grocery store:
Random Father- I’m so proud of my little jimmy, he’s going to make varsity
Exile- that’s really something *puts cans of deviled ham on the conveyor belt*
Random Father- it sure is, too bad your boy couldn’t cut it
Exile- um, he didn’t even try out for the team, besides, I don’t think sports are really where his talents lie
Random Father- oh, well, I’m sure there’s still some reason to be proud of him
Exile- He has other talents
Random Father- and just what talents are those?
Exile (to Damien)- hey son, could you melt this guy’s face?
Damien- *points his finger melting his face*
Exile- At’ta boy, Do you want to go get ice cream!
Damien- …
Exile- Damien?
Damien- ...
Exile- Oh that’s right, you don’t talk

How cool would that be?

Hey, if the parents of the Malcolm In The Middle kid can do it, why can’t I?



Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Haiku Friday

Didn't want to leave
didn't want to come back here
I want to go back

Cash is really low
thank America Express
course, now I'll owe them

this could get me down
but one thing keeps me going
a mutual crush








Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

WELCOME TO CANADA, BITCH! (With A Dash Of HNT)

(Alternate Title: Who Took My Toque?)

Greeting all you koo koo crazy kids! As promised, I have returned, with tales of suspense and intrigue. Of course, the suspense and intrigue have to do with whether or not my truck would still be at LAX when I go home. (What do you expect in an $8 a day parking lot?)

I'm also including a little HNT action, seeing as though it's taken me this long to finally get this post done

As I’m sure many of you deciphered from my last post I went on a little vacation up north, Canada way. But the trip wasn’t for the beer, and it wasn’t for the Poutine, but rather to see that Hottie Hella and the ever-Saucy Sassy.

Seeing as though the Canadian chica’s have already beaten me to the weekend review (cause I’m a slacker) I’ll do my best to not bore you with too much repetition.

This was my plan:
The travel plan for the trip is a bit messy though, in order to catch my flight out of LAX Friday morning I have to work a little "mojo." My plan for the day is to finish work, eat dinner, go to sleep by 6pm, wake up at midnight, drive to LAX, battle security, and sleep in the terminal to catch my 6:30am flight. Needless to say this has completely screwed up my sense of time.

And in usual Exile fashion things went off with numerous hitches.
1. I couldn’t’ sleep past 9 pm
2. I couldn’t find Parking Lot B to save my life
3. Once there, no one could give two fucks about which bus I should take to get to the actual airport
4. I couldn’t understand the Zimbabwean bus driver
5. I didn’t know that LAX actually closes
6. I didn’t know that LAX doesn’t open till 4:30 am
7. The flight did not serve a meal
8. The food court didn’t open till six (right about the time my was flight boarding)
9. The seats on Air Canada are tiny. Hell, tampons are given more legroom. (No space = no comfort = no sleep)
10. The movie on the flight was The Devil Wear’s Prada. A movie so bad, that I nearly sucker-punched the stewardess for announcing it (in both English and French, natch.)

The flight arrived 15 min early, which resulted in a cold sweat as I realized that there was no Hella and no Sass to be found. It felt like my phone took an hour to recalibrate to Canadian so I could make a call.

A few parking issues resulted in a slight delay for the girls and a string of profanities that verbally castrated the incompetent driver in front of them.

I tried to find a visible stop for the girls to see me, which happened to be standing on the corner (insert hooker joke here) with freezing wind blowing through my jacket and a dash of frozen rain. Luckily my heroines arrived just as part of me began to, well… you know.

“The Califfffffffornian is fffffffreezing!”

Luckily, once in the car I began to warm up, then heat up, eventually the jacket came off (unfortunately my pants stayed on, hehehe).

Friday night was a mixture of marinated meatballs and “get to know you” chitchat. It’s amazing how much you can enjoy just “chill’n.” the excitement of seeing all my little blog-lings pushed all thoughts of “you’ve been up for nearly 24 hours” out of my mind.

And as I have noted in the past, Canada is a weird place, and I do mean weird.
For instance:
· Did you know milk comes in bags in Canada? It also has a small letter-opening tool for opening the bag.
· Canada loves Canada. They advertise to themselves that they should visit Canada on a regular basis. Even the Canadian symbol for Canada (The Maple Leaf) is on everything. It became a game to see if that could spot the “leaf.”
· A beanie is called a toque (too-ka). It turns out that when one is at “the clay hills” yelling out “who took my toque” is only funny to people who know you’re American. (Inside comment: “what was up with the tampon?”)
· It’s easier just to hand the cashier a hand full of money and look at him suspiciously, then it is to figure out what the hell the money is worth there. At the movies I bought a bag of popcorn and 2 SODAS for a fist full of “funny money.” I couldn’t afford Park Place or Boardwalk.
· Canadian Tire Company is like Wal-Mart, except they make their own money.
· Poutine is essentially fries with brown gravy and white cheese, and if you look at Sassy’s blog, you’ll it kinda looks like what it will look like before and after you’re done eating, but it is pretty tasty.(But somethings are even more tasty)

· A napkin is called a “ser-ve-ett,” but luckily a paper towel is a paper towel.


Canadian-isims aside, there were other shenanigans to be had. We played multiple rounds of Lightning Reactions, we played a card game that nearly gave me an aneurysm, and watch as both Mr and Mrs Sass entered into a battle of wills over who could keep from talking the longest (the loser had to clean the windshield). Ironically they both lost at the same time, but wouldn’t admit it.

Now, I’m man enough to admit when I’ve been beaten, and yes, I was beaten. Hella kicked my ass at the driving games we played at Dave & Busters. But in my own defense Hella does have a bit more practice, see, she drives in real life the way she drives in the game, so…

There are few things sexier than girls who can whoop-ass at video games (yes, even if it’s my ass getting whooped). Hella even kicked my ass at Air Hockey, the best part was after scoring a wicked goal she screamed out “Welcome to Canada, Bitch!” I suppose it serves me right to come between a Canadian and hockey. (Side note: we went to dinner and there was a hockey game on TV at the bar, Hella could not pry her eyes from the screen)

Sure, there are some things we didn’t have time to do, but all that means is that there may just be another trip in the works. A taste is good, but two tastes are better, besides, I do believe I’m owed a “Forrest Gump Dance.” (Thanks Hella’s Mom!)

All and all I have to say that this trip was everything I could have ever wanted and more. Mr and Mrs Sass were the best of hosts and have earned a special place in my heart (right next to the whips and the chains). Thanks to you guys I’m feeling a little more Canadian, (I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.)

So who’s sex on skates now?


As for Hella, let’s just say there is a vast shortage of amazing women in the world, a handful at most, and she is among the best of them. (Sass, what do you mean she floated away?)




Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Ration Out This Post, It's Gotta Last You A Few Days (HNT, Haiku Friday, Week-End Wrap Up...)

Busy Busy Busy

With stress and distress this has been a hectic few months. But finally the one event I’ve been looking forward to is upon me, or should I say, it will be up-on me, hehehe.

In any case I figured seeing as though I’m leaving my post I should leave post to cover my blog-ligations. (HNT, Haiku Friday, Week-End Wrap Up...)

First and foremost, congratulations to me! After a shit load of stress and studying I got a promotion at work. I’m going be coming to work earlier and working more, but there's a pay increase and options for overtime! More money = happy Exile

Bring in some moo-lah
I start at six forty five
so much for sleep


I started plotting over a month ago to go on a little vay-kay, and this is the weekend it's built up to. I’ve been counting down the days, and now I’m counting down the hours...

I planned ahead
a trip to clear my head
and get some... rest



The travel plan for the trip is a bit messy though, in order to catch my flight out of LAX Friday morning I have to work a little "mojo." My plan for the day is to finish work, eat dinner, go to sleep by 6pm, wake up at midnight, drive to LAX, battle security, and sleep in the terminal to catch my 6:30am flight. Needless to say this has completely screwed up my sense of time.

Leaving tonight
Or technically tomorrow?
Is it today yet?


Seeing as though it’s HNT, I am proud to honor the requests made by both Ms Sexy Duet & His Fucktoy. (fyi, those blogs are very saucy, and very NSFW)

The requests were to shoot a pic with 3 things that start with the letter “M” and to give that same smile from last week’s HNT


Music, Monkeys, and Money (three M’s I can’t get enough of)

Too bad i couldn't find any of these in time...



So wish me luck on my flight, seeing as though I will be flying on Friday the 13th.

With that I’m off, off to a place where I want to be and place that wants me,
It's nice to be wanted...





(Oh, and before you ask where, keep in mind there hints all over the blog, if you’ve been playing along at home you may have already figured it out. Hehehe)

Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Cash Crunch

This planet has—or rather had—a problem, which was this: most of the people on it were unhappy for pretty much of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movements of small green pieces of paper, which is odd because on the whole it wasn't the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy.

~ The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy


Recently I’ve found my self in a bit of a fiduciary funk, as it were.

Now before you consider selling your stocks in Exile Industries, keep in mind that the lay offs are less about the current deficit and more about just good old fashion cruelty. Furthermore I would like to put down all rumors that Herb as been "slither'n" the streets for extra money. (What he does on his own time is his business.

Just to get you cats and kittens caught up, allow me to explain. If you go by the numbers currently my income/outgo ratio is pretty balanced. As we all know, the "numbers" usually don't take into account things that pop up unexpected. (Car repair, necessary big purchases, etc.) So with the past few months I haven't been able to put much into the old savings as I’d like, as in, anything.

Last month and this month, however, had been pretty tough. Last month I juggled the books wrong and was over drawn twice, this displeased me greatly seeing as though this was the first time this had ever happened (I’m very financially minded, mind you.) then, through an error on the part of my mortgage company they sent me two bills for the same month, so I inadvertently paid them an extra month in advance.

Normally, paying a bill early is no problem for me, I just figure that I saved my self some time next month, but a new problem has emerged. It turns out that my mom is going to go in for surgery soon, it has something to do with getting older and being a woman (at the same time). I’m not too worried about the procedure, I’m sure they're going to just rotate the tires and drop in a new transmission, but the problem is that my parents need to "borrow" $5000 dollars from me to get the procedure done. I told them they better throw in a free smog check too. (Borrow is in quotes because technically the money is theirs, but they were going to collect it when I sold my condo.)

When it comes to my parents I have no qualms about loaning them money, I mean, hey, I know where they live and I’m in the will... my problem is that I was told about this last week and they need the money by the end of the month. With bills, mortgage, and such on my end of things I’m coming up about $4000 short.

Had I known about this a few months back I could have saved up more, but seeing as though my family likes to hide these things from each other I guess one month to make the money isn't so bad... I mean, hell, $1000 a week? Piece of cake. *Gulp*

The few ideas I’ve had for making some quick cash won't bring me near my objective:
1. Sell blood (A+ CMV- it's good shit)
2. Whore out my truck (rent out the sides of my truck as ad space)
3. Collect debts (there's a reason these people have debt...)
4. Move people on the weekend ("you want me to move the piano again?")
5. Night Job (sleep is for the weak)
6. Sell nude self pics (who am I kidding, I can't get people to look at'em for free)
7. Wash cars (time to break out the banana hammock)
8. Pull the money off my American Express ($4000 in 4 weeks or 6 weeks? hmmmmm....)
9. Sell my soul (it's not worth much, but you can always use a spare...)
10. Start Selling burgers by the side of the road (mmmmmmm... freeway off ramp burger...)

*Sigh*

I'll figure out something, I mean, I do a savings bond or two I can cash out, but seeing as though they're not quite "ripe" yet. In other words, with the compound interest I’ll be losing potential money by opening them now. Regardless the situation I’ll figure it out.



On the lighter side of money, another one of my bills popped up on Where's George

The bill traveled 318 miles in only 74 days!
(4.3 miles a day, shit, I can't even do that)
Click here for the details





Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

A Taste Of Passion

I am a creature of passion.

It is my driving force.

Though passion I become inspired to write and savor the things that make life worth living. Without it I become a cold and bleak, a husk.

Imagine, if you will, a great web, each silky thread tying together the different talents and abilities I possess. Romance, life, writing, health, all these things are entwined in these webs, connected. The strands of this web is formed by passion it's self and as the passion is diminished so is the strength of the web, eventually these abilities slip through the web, and fade away.

My ability to write is often the first and most dramatically affected; with out a passion for the words, every piece of writing becomes hollow and stale. Where before I would write as a means of making my thoughts tangible, ultimately the act of writing became a labor that I was forced to endure. My creative side ached as I watched myself mill out hack quality work. Eventually I found that I’d rather not write then to put forth more tripe into the world already filled to the brim.

Without passion, I could feel the machine inside me grinding to an eventual halt, soon life, health, and laughter all follow in step.

You never know how hungry you can be until you’re starving, and much like food, there is no substitute for passion. There is no quick fix, no casual encounter that can fully replace the sensation of passion.

Passion is something that is as far beyond mere sex as sex is beyond a simple handshake. Passion in it’s purest of forms is something that fills every breath, drives every movement, and fuses with every molecule of your being. The only way to honestly experience passion to this degree is to share it with someone who thirsts for it, hungers for it, and appreciates it. It can be expressed through a kiss, a touch, a look, or even through words. Passion can only be felt in a place deep inside us, a place that feels eternally empty until it is filled to the brink of rupture.

Finding someone to truly share pure passion with is rare.
So rare, that the stars themselves align with greater regularity.

Passion is the essence of life, the rational conclusion to being. And while it may often lie beyond the most difficult obstacles life can set before us, basking in those fleeting moments make everything worthwhile.

For those starving for such illusive bliss I ask, “what would you do for a taste of passion?”




(3 more days)

Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Fun & Games Time

Ok, I have nothing to write, but I thought I'd let you kids have some fun.

This 1st game is a jig saw puzzle, enjoy!



This 2nd game comes with a prize!
Use the picture to finish this phrase and you get to pick this weeks HNT!


"Eventually I'll get _______________"



Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Haiku Friday

What is with Christmas?
can't it stay in it's own month?
skipping Halloween?

mad props from Randi!
I'm quite proud of my button
did you get yours yet?

this time next week
a taste of passion awaits
seven days to go




Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

HNDE- Half Nekk'ed Dark Exile

We all have our dark side



Lately, I've been losing track of mine




Happy HNT


Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Medical Insurance Is Neat!

So i finally have medical insurance now, and man does it feel good.

For those of you out side the state, let me explain. In America you can go to a doctor for free, get all your ailments tended to, and get all the medication you need... So long as you're in prison. As a free honest citizen, however, paying for medical treatment is so astronomical in cost that it is neigh impossible. If you have medical insurance the cost for treatment and the like decreases drastically, but the insurance is still very expensive. The only recourse is to work at a job where your medical insurance is included as a benefit with your job. In other words you must sell your soul to save your flesh.

Now, as for my self, I was fucked over by my employers on the medical benefit side of things for so long that the least they could have done was give me the common courtesy of a "reach-around." but alas, no, no benefits meant i for years i couldn't go to a real.

when i say years i mean years, i think the last real doctor i went to was when i was at least seven years ago.
when i say "real doctor" what i mean is a doctor who isn't practicing in a tool shed.

See, to get "treatment" like antibiotics and STD screens (don't look at me like that, i like to be safe) i had to go to the school doctor. Junior College school doctors are terrible, you'd think they'd know anatomy better seeing as though they spend so much time with their heads up their asses. Essentially it's self service medicine.

But today i actually got to go to a real doctor and had insurance to boot! It was kinda funny because i didn't realize what bad shape i was in until i saw the doctor's reactions to my ailments. Just to give you an idea, here's an abridged list of my medical issues:

two bad shoulders damaged at the gym.
respiratory ailments (black mold in my old office)
horrible stomach issues
possible digestive track damage (reread that last one)
joint pain
Possibilities of anxiety and depression
lack of medical treatment for 7 years ("what vaccinations?")
zero medical records
and yadda yadda yadda

Long and the short of it, I'm a mess.

The one cool thing about this guy is that he's actually on my side on things. Usually people tell me that my medical concerns are all in my head (esp. The school doctors). But he hooked me up with a few free samples and a prescription for more goodies (better living through chemistry).

I have an appointment tomorrow to a bunch of tests so you know I'm looking forward to that.

on thing i do like about this doctor is that they said my appointment was at 12 and i saw the doctor AT 12 O'CLOCK! Usually it takes at least an hour.

Yes, i know it's lame to be excited about going to the doctors, but when you've gone this long with out it. But I'm still not looking forward to going to the dentist.



Exile

Original_exile@hotmail.com

Haiku Friday Buttons!

You wish to be cool
Then learn the ways of Haiku
And get the bitches




With he success of Haiku Fridays I felt it was only fitting that it have it's own button. Something that says "hey, I have a Haiku Friday button."

For those who are not in the know, the "Haiku Fridays" concept (a brain child of Randi and Coodence) is a weekly tradition where one must post three Haiku's each Friday. They can range from a weekly review, to plans for world domination but must follow the rules of the Haiku.

Hai-ku~ a major form of Japanese verse, written in 17 syllables divided into 3 lines of 5, 7, and 5 syllables, and employing highly evocative allusions and comparisons, often on the subject of nature or one of the seasons.

So don't forget
Five, Seven, Five Rule
You will be just fine

Now that your Haiku-Kung-Fu is truly refined it is time for you to take your button into the world...



Copy and paste the code into you blog
<a href="http://exileindustries.blogspot.com/2006/10/haiku-friday-buttons.html"><img src="http://static.flickr.com/84/259186253_c6a801d4a4_t.jpg" width="85" height="100" alt="Haiku Fridays" /></a>

Go Grasshopper,
go forth using your new skills
and pimp dat shit, yo




Special Thanks to Binh Vu for providing the drawing of Rurouni Kenshin.
For more of his work, please click here.


(BTW, don't point out the irony that I created this Haiku Friday post on a Wednesday, thanks.)

Exile